It’s cards on the table time. I don’t like it when my Australian politicians beat around the bush and I’ve had enough of it here in the stitching groups.
For years I have been stalked by a pest named Ellen Lee. She also goes under names like Angelica Creates, Angelica’s Beads etc.
I first met Ellen online many years ago and she seemed really nice, really sweet, a harmless, poor sweet lady who got a bit befuddled now and then. So I was nice to her. I sent her a RAK, she sent me a RAK. And I got myself a stalker.
I’d mention I bought a chart, so she would buy that chart. I found some gorgeous new fabric, well next minute she bought some of that fabric. I joined a new stitching group and within hours or a day, Ellen had joined.
Then Ellen and I had a falling out. I asked Ellen onlist, why she was asking people to buy her fabric because she’s so poor when she posted on another list the same day crowing about a dozen charts she’s just bought? Ellen emailed me and asked me why I was being so mean? She emailed the moderators and asked that I be booted off that group.
But onlist the stalker behaviour continued. Even today, if I buy a chart, Ellen just has to buy it or gush over it. If I join a group, she joins it within hours, only now she emails the owners and moderators and telling them how mean I am to her and would they protect her from me? I know this because over the years some have outright asked me about it. I have not had a offlist discussion with Ellen in at least five years. All onlist discussion is polite, civil, even jovial.
I do continue to politely question Ellen when she cries poor in group but crows about her latest purchases in another. You see, I do not know who Ellen is. On one group she says she has bought two dozen charts in a sale, in another group she says she has been on a stash diet for three months and can’t afford any of the new charts she adores, in another group, she’s too busy to shop because she’s stitching a commission. In all the years I have known Ellen online I have never seen one photo of her stitching. But in at least one group at a time she’s always wishing she could afford what someone else has.
I have a lot of personal misgivings about Ellen as a person. I personally believe she is a scam artist. I do not believe she is a stitcher. I believe she talks a great game to con people into feeling sorry for her and to send her stitching related materials which she can then sell. She is an Amazon registered seller and has had an eBay account. I do not have proof of any specific incidents. I do not intend to sway anyone else’s minds. I am telling you my state of mind – laying my cards on the table.
Despite my misgivings, I do not contact Ellen offlist and I felt I treated her well on lists, and professionally when I am a moderator. If her emails conform to the rules of the lists I let the emails through. If the emails break the rules of the lists, I delete them. Over 75% of her emails to the TSS RAK Group I co-moderated broke the rules of the list because she asked the list members to contact her offlist and/or she asked for everything the person was offering to re-home instead of specifying one or two items. Her emails were deleted by all three moderators. Every other email went through to the list.
Yesterday morning Kay Jones and I (co-moderators of the RAK group) were accused by the The Stitching Specialist group owner, Abi, of persecuting Ellen on the TSS RAK Group. I had not spoken to Abi about any of the above, so I presume Ellen had done her usual play nice to everyone onlist and stab me in the back offlist with the owners.
The RAK Group. Just to clear things up. Abi didn’t want the RAK Group. Kay had to beg her for weeks into letting her set up, Abi was a member from the start, however, she nominated Kay, Nancy and myself to run it. She never asked to be a moderator or owner and rarely posted. She intimated to the other Moderators that she was happy with the way the group was running and was happy to let things carry on. Her demand to be made owner came as a bolt from the blue yesterday morning as part of the “You and Mel are persecuting Ellen” email she sent Kay. Our persecution was sending one public email each congratulating Ellen on receiving a RAK.
Abi who Kay thought was her best friend. Abi and Kay best friends. Until Kay invited me to TSS and Ellen joined within hours.
In my anger, yesterday, I booted Ellen Lee from the Allstitchers group list (which I co-own with two others). It was the first and only time I have ever taken punitive action against Ellen for all of the damage she has done to me and my friends over these years. She has been banned from Allstitchers but that decision and action was not taken by me. I was too busy having a pity party for myself and Kay.
Ellen has many many friends on the stitching groups. I know I’m going to receive hate mail on this one. Despite personal misgivings, I always treat Ellen well. I do however, delete Ellen’s begging posts before they reach the list when I am moderator and I question them onlist in places when I am a member. This may slow down the amount of stuff people send her out of pity. This may be the real persecution she feels. Not any malice on my part, just an obstacle in her business plan.
I am so unbelievably sad at the number of friendships this woman breaks in her scamming.
Read this, hate me if you want, but there’s my view. There’s my cards. There’s the honest, unvarnished truth as I see it.
I just wish Ellen would go away. At the least, leave me and my friends alone.